Week 376 of #ThursThreads had many fantastic tales. I’m honored to see all the writers come to tie a tale as we start our eighth year. If you’ve been doing it a while, thank you. If you’ve just found us, welcome! May you come back again and write more great flash. Thousand thanks to Naima Simone for judging this week. Check out the #ThursThreads #flashfiction group on Facebook or the #ThursThreads Group on MeWe to keep up with news, etc.
- Bill Engleson | @billmelaterplea
- Cara Michaels | @caramichaels
- Silver James | @SilverJames_
- Jo Hawk | @JoHawktheWriter
- Siobhan Muir | @SiobhanMuir
- Mark A. Morris
- Terry Brewer | @Stories2121
- Nikki Prince | @AuthorNPrince
- Sheilagh Lee | @SweetSheil
- Teresa Eccles | @TeresaMEccles
- David A. Ludwig | @DavidALudwig
- Tina Glasneck | @TinaGlasneck
- Daelyn Morgana | @DaelynMorgana
- Kel J. Heinen | @Aightball
Naima says: All of the stories were so good. I mean, wow. I was entertained today, certainly, but I was also just blown away by some truly awesome writing. Thank you so much for sharing!
Cara Michaels | @caramichaels
Naima says: Wow. First, that beginning just immediately sucks you in. A forty-foot fall and no one’s dead? Oh hells yes! I need to read more. And the dialogue is natural, the writing easy to read and seamless. Even the prompt totally fits like a perfect puzzle piece. This line is a perfect example of the great writing.
“Why the hell would I do that?” He cut me off, rising over me once more, all mildly insulted and ridiculously beautiful. “Seems a shitty way to thank you for saving my life.”
I was just dragged me into this story, and I want to know more. And SUPERHEROES!!!
Silver James | @SilverJames_
Naima says: There’s a saying that I’ve heard all my writing life: God is in the details. And this excerpt is the reason why that saying was created.
He tracked her, as unobtrusively as a guy carrying his bulk and notoriety could.
He unwrapped a Tootsie Pop and stuck it in his mouth.
She wasn’t a local and she carried that air of officiousness that suggested she was here to meddle.
And these were just a few of the little descriptions and handful of words that made this so incredibly rich. She painted the picture. I feel like I already know Pops’ personality and a little about him and his history in just 248 words! Also, that ending. Talk about a cliffhanger and leaving me wanting to know more! This was awesome.
Tina Glasneck | @TinaGlasneck
Naima says: I loved this because it seemed utterly normal—like something your grandmother would nag you about, being “manless”—until you read down to the ghostly hands. Color me intrigued AND pink, because I was tickled. The excerpt is this beautiful and easy blending of contemporary and paranormal. And the voice is amazing. So smooth and natural. Just from this small peek, I know this world building is intricate. But the voice of the heroine is flawless and makes me know traversing this world won’t be difficult in her head. Also, in this short piece, the author has me caring and totally invested in the heroine. I want her to win even as I want to shout a warning at her, “Nah, girl! Don’t resurrect the dead! You crazy??” LOL! Yeah, totally invested. A wonderfully written piece.
Daelyn Morgana | @DaelynMorgana
Naima says: This was utterly unique. I’m an 80s music girl so I hadn’t heard the song No Rest for the Wicked by Lykke Li. But after reading this? I doggone sure went online to find it and listen. This piece was haunting, vivid and emotional. This line: “Flags wave at half mast for my survivor’s guilt.” So. Freaking. Good. And then that last line? It left me damn near lunging from my seat to stop him. It just made me feel. Plus, incorporating the lyrics as part of it? If the author hadn’t mentioned that down at the bottom, I wouldn’t have known. It was that seamless. Just wonderful.
Week 376 Winner
Naima says: Simply put, I was seduced. I don’t know if I’m a fan of Agatha or the demon. That ambiguity had me both uncomfortable and titillated. Which is a hallmark of some great writing. This line—“… his voice turning inside her like a melon baller, gouging away at her consciousness.”—and several others just had me wishing I had written it. And then there’s this:
“You’ll have been expecting the demon responsible for your acne, I’d guess. My specialism’s usually pestilence but I’m sure I can manage to do something to take your mind off that. But it’ll cost you your eternal soul and I don’t do refunds.”
Jithuus sounds like a complete asshole, and I’m here for it. I want to know why Agatha summoned him. Perhaps more importantly, I want to know BOTH of their stories. What’s going to happen between the two of them? Will there be a two of them? What does Agatha want? What does Jithuus want? Oh yes, seduced. Like, entranced. By the author’s voice. The characters. The circumstances. The world-building. The piece accomplishes what any writer craves—getting his reader to continue flipping the pages.
The demon smirked. He sat back on his haunches with his hands behind him. He was careful not to touch the ward line circumscribing the mandala he’d appeared inside, but he was as nonchalant as ever.
“You’re supposed to be obedient,” Agatha wailed. “The grimoire said you’d be obliged to do whatever I said.”
Jithuus shrugged. He manifested a scroll from the otherworld and began to read an incantation, his voice turning inside her like a melon baller, gouging away at her consciousness. She fell forward onto her knees and her nose began to bleed, the drops splattering against the floor.
“Enough?” he said, interrupting himself. He marked the line he’d reached with a stab of a claw, the parchment smouldering where he touched it.
Agatha nodded, glad of the respite. She could smell a burning in her sinuses that she knew came from within, an aroma of spoiled meat making her feel nauseous.
“I’m not the one you expected, am I?” The demon scooted forward so their noses almost bumped, the invisible wall all that was keeping them apart. “I have heard it all before, of course. The wrong intonation, a subtle change in the phrasing. Demon names can be diabolically difficult to pronounce. You’ll have been expecting the demon responsible for your acne, I’d guess. My specialism’s usually pestilence but I’m sure I can manage to do something to take your mind off that. But it’ll cost you your eternal soul and I don’t do refunds.”
Congratulations Thirteen Time Winner Mark, and Honorable Mentions Cara, Silver, Tina and Daelyn! Don’t forget to claim your badges and display them with pride. You certainly earned it!
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